ocvictor: (MORTAL KOMBAT!)
I've been so busy these past few months, that it totally slipped my mind that we never finished !!!MORTAL KOMBAT POETRY SLAM!!! Can you ever forgive me?

Results of Bout Four:

1.) Childhood favorite Maurice Sendak went all wild thing on Baxter Black!
2.) National Slam Champ "Mighty" Mike McGee beats Poet Laureate Donald Hall! Film at 11!
3.) In a tie breaker, Rachel McKibbens went all lady gang on Terrence Hayes!
4.) Also in a tie breaker, Geoffrey Chaucer defeated Scott Woods! (Sorry Scott, but this guy had to survive telling these poems and stories out loud in Medieval taverns. I suspect he had mad skills.)

Bout Five

1.) Maurice Sendak vs. "Mighty" Mike McGee
2.) Rachel McKibbens vs. Geoffrey Chaucer

In case you've forgotten the rules, post who you think would win in each poetry slam, taking both writing and performing ability into account. And whenever possible, give us a reason why. Trash talk encouraged!

Fight!
ocvictor: (MORTAL KOMBAT!)
Results of Bout Three!

1.) Wammo came here to shoot heroin and fuck, and it looks like he's all out of both. Winner: Baxter Black
2.) Donald Hall puts Kimiko Hahn in the graveyard.
3.) Jimmy Carter needs someone to build a house for him, cause Terrence Hayes knocked his down
4.) Geoffrey Chaucer trumps Alicia Ostriker
5.) Bob Flanagan is disqualified when nailing parts of himself to a wood plank is considered a prop. Winner: Maurice Sendak
6.) “Mighty” Mike McGee would rather throw dead batteries at cows than listen to Matt Cook
7.) Marty McConnell falls to Rachel McKibbens
8.) Scott Woods gives Tess Gallagher a kiss off.

Now we're in the home stretch!

!!!BOUT FOUR!!! VOTE!!!!!

1.) Maurice Sendak vs. Baxter Black
2.) Donald Hall vs. “Mighty” Mike McGee
3.) Rachel McKibbens vs. Terrence Hayes
4.) Scott Woods vs. Geoffrey Chaucer
ocvictor: (MORTAL KOMBAT!)
You People have really slipped on the trash talk. Talk trashier!

Results of Bout Two, Round Two!

9.) Henry David Thoreau takes a long lwalk along Walden Pond after losing to Baxter Black
10.) Kimiko Hahn trumps Diane Wakoski
11.) Lou Reed changed his name and now he is a she after losing to Terrence Hayes
12.) Being of this round, James Still cannot pass beyond. Winner: Geoffrey Chaucer
13.) Bob Flanagan pummels Marilyn Nelson,and at least one of them likes it!
14.) Matt Cook defeats Kaneko Mitsuharu
15.) Rachel McKibbens shows Derrick Brown how we do it in the OC, bitch!
16.) PSI President Scott Woods puts Gary Mex Glazner down Lorca style.

***

BOUT THREE!!!

And now, it gets tough, so tell us a little about why you think each poet should win or lose this round. Or, just make wisecracks. That works, too.

1.) Wammo vs. Baxter Black
2.) Donald Hall vs. Kimiko Hahn
3.) Jimmy Carter vs. Terrence Hayes
4.) Alicia Ostriker vs. Geoffrey Chaucer
5.) Maurice Sendak vs. Bob Flanagan
6.) “Mighty” Mike McGee vs. Matt Cook
7.) Marty McConnell vs. Rachel McKibbens
8.) Tess Gallagher vs. Scott Woods
ocvictor: (MORTAL KOMBAT!)
This week just shot by me, and I've not had time to post the results/next round. In any case, here's last round's winners:

Bout Two, Round One Begins!

1.) Wammo tells Marc Smith to "Pull this up, pal!"
2.) Lee Renaldo goes down in a teenage riot. Winner: Donald Hall
3.) D.A. Powell will need a few Cocktails after his thumping by Jimmy Carter
4.) Alicia Ostriker beats Joseph Brodsky in a tie breaking decision, because while I love both their work, I suspect Alicia reads better. (Only heard Brodsky on tape and, eh.)
5.) Cecilia Woloch finds herself Sacrificed to Maurice Sendak
6.) Into the valley of death rode Alfred, Lord Tennyson. Winner: “Mighty” Mike McGee. And, love Mike as I do, you people are smoking crack.
7.) On the other hand, I can buy Marty McConnell beating Ben Johnson, cause really, his poems aren't all that without his plays.
8.) Tess Gallagher shows Mona Van Duyn a thing or two about the current popularity of writing poetry. (Worst! Lit reference! Ever!)

Bout Two, Round Two!

And remember, you can vote if you haven't before -- juump in any time!

9.) Henry David Thoreau vs. Baxter Black
10.) Diane Wakoski vs. Kimiko Hahn
11.) Lou Reed vs. Terrence Hayes
12.) Geoffrey Chaucer vs. James Still
13.) Marilyn Nelson vs. Bob Flanagan
14.) Kaneko Mitsuharu vs. Matt Cook
15.) Derrick Brown vs. Rachel McKibbens
16.) Gary Mex Glazner vs. Scott Woods
ocvictor: (MORTAL KOMBAT!)
Sorry for the delay -- had a lot on my plate this week. Everyone's on pins and needles, I'm sure!

Results of Bout Four!

25.) Cowboy poet Baxter Black makes a ghost girl of Amy Gerstler
26.) Kimiko Hahn gives Henry Real Bird that driftwood feelin'.
27.) Terrence Hayes hip checks Lord Buckley
28.) James Still is leaving the door open for David Ignatow
29.) Sparrow goes up in a bad poetry explosion. Winner: Bob Flanagan
30.) What we carry away from this bout is that Matt Cook trumps Dorianne Laux
31.) Rachel McKibbens agrees with Ruth Forman that poetry should ride the bus -- outta here!
32.) And in the bout that had to happen, Scott Woods beats Morris Stegosaurus by a hare!

And that's the end of Round One! Half our poets are gone. Whose literary cuisine reigns supreme?

Bout Two, Round One Begins!

1.) Wammo vs. Marc Smith
2.) Donald Hall vs. Lee Renaldo
3.) Jimmy Carter vs. D.A. Powell
4.) Alicia Ostriker vs. Joseph Brodsky
5.) Cecilia Woloch vs. Maurice Sendak
6.) “Mighty” Mike McGee vs. Alfred, Lord Tennyson
7.) Marty McConnell vs. Ben Johnson
8.) Tess Gallagher vs. Mona Van Duyn

FIGHT!!!
ocvictor: (MORTAL KOMBAT!)
Results of Round Three:

Hmmm ... light on trash talk last round, but no walks, either!

17.) Sam Hamill is protesting the senseless violence of Henry David Thoreau's attack
18.) Maya Del Valle found herself in a Def Jam against Diane Wakoski
19.) When they came to take Danny Solis away, we told them "it wasn't the guiness, it wasn't the guiness! It was Lou Reed!"
20.) Michael Stipe is losing his religion to Geoffrey Chaucer
21.) Hey, Tupac! A rose may grow in the concrete, but Marilyn Nelson still wins!
22.) While Junichiro Tanizaki praises shadows, Kaneko Mitsuharu wins!
23.) Anis Mojgani was given a direct order to rock the fuck out, but Derrick Brown still wins.
24.) Margaret Atwood's loss to Gary Mex Glazner is a tragic handmaiden's tale. (Stop it. These literary puns aren't easy!)

Round Four -- Last Seeds of the First Bout!!!

25.) Amy Gerstler vs. Baxter Black
26.) Kimiko Hahn vs. Henry Real Bird
27.) Terrence Hayes vs. Lord Buckley
28.) David Ignatow vs. James Still
29.) Bob Flanagan vs. Sparrow
30.) Dorianne Laux vs. Matt Cook
31.) Rachel McKibbens vs. Ruth Forman
32.) Morris Stegosaurus vs. Scott Woods

FIGHT!!!!
ocvictor: (MORTAL KOMBAT!)
Results of Bout Two!

9.) We had joy, we had fun, Rod Mckuen's rotting in the sun. Winner: Marc Smith
10.) Memo to Dave Alvin: Any Rough Times Are Now Behind you, because you lost to Lee Renaldo.
11.) Jane Kenyon goes down despite her Bright Unequivocal Eye. Winner: D.A. Powell
12.) Despite what my own poem says, Joseph Brodsky ain't dead, as he triumphs over David St. John.
13.) Maurice Sendak crushes Don Marquis like a talking cockroach.
14.) Alfred, Lord Tennyson may have beat Sir Walter Scott, but he can never take his freedom! (OK, OK. I know that's from "Braveheart" and not "Rob Roy.")
15.) Ben Johnson made Edmund Spenser his Faerie Queene.
16.) Donald Justice served. Winner: Mona Van Duyn.

Bout Three!

17.) Sam Hamill vs. Henry David Thoreau
18.) Maya Del Valle vs. Diane Wakoski
19.) Lou Reed vs. Danny Solis
20.) Geoffrey Chaucer vs. Michael Stipe
21.) Tupac Shakur vs. Marilyn Nelson
22.) Junichiro Tanizaki vs. Kaneko Mitsuharu
23.) Anis Mojgani vs. Derrick Brown
24.) Margaret Atwood vs. Gary Mex Glazner

Obviously, the matches get a little surreal this bout. More room for trash talk!
ocvictor: (MORTAL KOMBAT!)
Previous Round:

A lot of strong wins, but only one walk.

1.) Jim Morrison fails to break on through to the other side. Winner? Wammo!
2.) In the battle of the poet laureates, Donald Hall made Andrew Motion his poodle.
3.) Jewel falls before a real knight without armor, Jimmy Carter.
4.) Claudia Emerson will have plenty of time for pitching horseshoes after her loss to Alicia Ostriker.
5.) Cecilia Woloch trumps Charles Bernstein.
6.) “Mighty” Mike McGee tells Shane Koyczan to take off to the great white north.
7.) Toi Derricotte is in the headlights of an oncoming car. being driven by Marty McConnell
8.) Tess Gallagher tells Kenneth Rexroth to Beat it!

Winners will progress to round two. Losers will weep.

***

Bout Two!

9.) Marc Smith vs. Rod Mckuen
10.) Dave Alvin vs. Lee Renaldo
11.) Jane Kenyon vs. D.A. Powell
12.) Joseph Brodsky vs. David St. John
13.) Maurice Sendak vs. Don Marquis
14.) Alfred, Lord Tennyson vs. Sir Walter Scott
15.) Ben Johnson vs. Edmund Spenser
16.) Mona Van Duyn vs. Donald Justice

FIGHT!
ocvictor: (MORTAL KOMBAT!)
They thought it was dead. They thought we'd never come up with 64 more poets we haven't used (and we'll admit, we struggled) But we're back.

Rules
There will be 32 match-ups of poets.
Poet's entire poetic catalogue is considered, alongside any considerations that might be garnered about how they might have performed said work in a slam situation.

Example: William Shakespeare's sonnets are considered, but not his plays. That he worked in theater would certainly be a consideration to his overall presentation.

Unlike some of my predecessors, I'm afraid I'm not going to provide links to poems. But Google is a mighty useful tool.

Vote for the winner of each seed in the comments (and smack talk as you wish) and they'll progress! And please, if you can, explain WHY. Or at least talk smack. Have we mentioned talking smack? In the case of a tie, I'll make the final decision. Going to try to finish a new round every two or three days or so.

You don't have to vote in every round, or even vote in every seed!!! Join in whenever you can!

Ready? Go!

***

Bout #1, Seeds 1 to 8:

1.) Jim Morrison vs. Wammo
2.) Donald Hall vs. Andrew Motion
3.) Jimmy Carter vs. Jewel
4.) Alicia Ostriker vs. Claudia Emerson
5.) Cecilia Woloch vs. Charles Bernstein
6.) “Mighty” Mike McGee vs. Shane Koyczan
7.) Toi Derricotte vs. Marty McConnell
8.) Kenneth Rexroth vs. Tess Gallagher

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Victor David Infante

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